My Dream

My dream, I believe, is entirely symbolic. As I woke, I knew that I must write it down and share it with those that have their eyes open. I have shared this dream with a few friends and it is interesting to see what symbolism resonates in their lives, and that it differs from what I learned from it.

My husband and I were invited to a dinner party. We did not know the couple. They were new to the area. The wife was exceptionally beautiful, graceful, alluring, strong, and yet very submissive to the husband in a weird hero worshiping way. The husband was of medium build and mesmerizing, late 40’s perhaps, well built athletically. I don’t remember his voice specifically, but I remember feeling captivated by his personality and strangely drawn to his presence. I didn’t want to leave or “miss anything”. It was like needing to use the restroom at the movie theater, but you suppress that need because of the desire to know what is going on - not wanting to be left out.  

We were initially alone with the couple in a spacious and well appointed room with a very large black grand piano. The colors were contrasting black and white, or light and dark, with a muted brown to accent. I don’t remember the conversation. I was just in awe that they had invited us. I felt very concerned about our behavior and our appearance and felt highly favored that we were invited to such an elite party.  I couldn’t believe they would invite a couple of our stature (a couple that is not very concerned about appearances, chooses to homeschool, has 8 children, and drives a 20 year old Suburban). I felt very anxious and pressured that we act “just so” as to not cause them any displeasure.

The next dream scene, we were in a larger group and doing some kind of getting to know you activity.  The husband was seated near the center of the group and he had what appeared to be a very sticky substance that was very drippy (similar to caramel sauce). He started to wipe it on his face. Everyone’s initial reaction was to gasp and my own reaction was very visceral. I was shocked and wondered why he would risk such odd behavior that would soil his clothes and possibly his reputation. I looked toward his wife and she acted as if this had been rehearsed many times before. She had no shock or surprise evident on her face. I could see she was completely devoted to him. Her lack of reaction was to normalize his astonishing behavior so that we would more readily accept it.  In a somewhat joking manner, she mentioned that he would often make people cry that were too weak to tolerate the oddities he would enact. This completely piqued my curiosity and I felt an urge to be strong enough to witness all the astounding things he would show us. I was completely entranced.

As the dream continued, in the next scene I found myself outside the home in a very green lush yard on a semi-circular driveway. My husband was still inside. I had not left because I wanted to. I was frustrated that I needed to nurse my baby and attend to this duty. I deeply wished I could be back inside because I did not want to miss anything.  

For some reason, I had to lay on my side on the driveway and nurse my baby. I was ashamed to be in such a lowly position and fervently hoped that no one would take notice of me in such a state.  My aim was to return to the inside as quickly as possible.

Just then I saw one of my friends leave the home weeping. She is one the kindest, soft-hearted people I know.  I rushed to her to stop her. Not out of a desire to comfort her, but to find out what I had missed.  What had made her cry? What fantastical thing had caused her to leave?

She said the husband talked about himself as a comforter. She was very distraught because she believed that his self-worth came from his ability to comfort others and he always wanted those around him to feel safe and to trust him, no matter the circumstances.  She felt awful and full of guilt because she couldn’t tolerate the outlandish behavior and his “comfort” or “safety” was not enough to keep her engaged in the activities. She finally had to leave, but was reluctant because of the perceived pain she was causing him. She then said something about the second comforter and immediately my eyes were opened and I saw clearly.

 I was horrified to realize that I had been completely deceived.  I only then realized that standing there in the open air and nature, that I was free to act and think for myself and inside I had felt an oppressively dark and conflicting feeling. Inside there was great pressure to maintain a particular appearance and facade to be able to remain with that group. I feared for my husband that was still inside, but knew that I could not return there to save him because of the risk of becoming deceived again due to my insatiable curiosity.  I was so grateful that I had come out because of my child.  I sensed that my husband would come out in a short time, but I was still anxious for his eyes to see clearly.

Dream Symbolism 

The following is the symbolism that I derived from the dream:

The husband is an antichrist - desiring to portray peace and safety, but it is only an illusion as he endeavors to spread immorality.

The wife is the people of the world or society. She normalizes immoral behavior.

The house is the world or Babylon.

The oddities  and strange behaviors are the things that distract us and entertain us - keep us in invisible bondage. Our initial reaction is one of shock, abhorrence, and revulsion. We are lulled into acceptance of sin and lose our discernment when we do not act promptly in the face of immoral behavior (the sticky substance that soils us).

I didn’t want to leave Babylon because I was so darn curious and didn’t want to be left out.

My friend didn’t want to leave because of possible pain she might be causing others.

People stay in Babylon for different reasons.

People leave Babylon for different reasons.

I left because of duty to my posterity, not because of a desire to be righteous. I still wanted to go back.

My friend left because she couldn’t tolerate the darkness any longer and displayed much greater strength than me.

The Message for Me

In this dream I believe that the Lord was telling me specifically that I am still "ashamed" of my duty. Even though I am out of Babylon, I am still not wanting to "be seen" (in the dream I am ashamed of nursing and endeavor to hide it).

I need to be unashamed of my testimony and boldly stand as a witness of my Savior and perform the tasks He has given me without fear. I have been struggling to accept my calling as a healer. I have the gift of healing.  It is difficult to even type those words and say it so bluntly. I fear the rebuke of my fellow church members more than Babylon's derision. The sifting is beginning and thus, I fear the ridicule that will come from my own brothers and sisters.

The Savior has charged me with telling my life story unashamedly and with vulnerability to encourage others to heal. This involves all the modalities of healing that He has brought into my life. This includes energy healing and I know that that creates division in even those that have their eyes open to see the signs of the times.

This dream has been difficult to share. I pray it will be understood by those with whom the Lord wants me to share it. In Christ, Jenny


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